Has It Only Been 2 Years....Seems Like Forever.

I know all the cliches.

What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger.

We acquire the strength we have overcome.

We have no right to ask when sorrow comes, "Why did this happen to me?" unless we ask the same question for every moment of happiness that comes our way.

Honestly, it's horseshit we tell ourselves to suffer through each day.

In two weeks, we will have reached a 24-month milestone since Paige's accident. Every one of our family (and even friends) have been affected. There is no part of our lives that have not been touched. We all will forever refer to things as "before" or "since" the accident.

I met a woman recently who lost her son to death. She reminded me of just how lucky we are. We lost the Paige that we all knew that night, but we have a different one that we all are so grateful to have and one we'd probably have never met otherwise. We're going to keep her.

As for myself, I feel like I have done a decent job of coping with the daily issues that have been bestowed upon us. I've been drug-free (I know, other than the Ambien, BUT I NEED IT and it's a RX). All I ask for is a few hours at night to recharge. And don't think I haven't been offered every substance known to (wo)man...I have tried to be a rock and deal with things as they've came.....

This past Monday morning, Tony and I had a conversation where I told him that my plate is full and I am unable to deal with any outside drama...My plate runneth over. (I think my grandma's plaque in the kitchen as a kid might have said cup, but you get it).

Since the making of that statement, I've had three major events this week. (See what you get for not knocking on wood?)

I guess the focus of this ramble needs to be more in the line of, "Really? Really? Do I look like I'm the Let It Be kind when it comes to my kids, family, livelihood?" To quote Paige (and Joe Dirt) a few years ago when she got in a heated debate with a pastor, "Is this where you want to be when Jesus comes back?". (yeah, that was me fighting judgment with religion, BALLIN')

The funny thing about being maxed out mentally is it makes you CRAZY; aka insanity defense.
After what I've been through, I think you all know that I don't have much else to lose. When you work 18 hours a day, jail looks like vacation. Time in a cell is time to do those G.I. Jane push-ups and make friends with the criminal lot....and I'm pretty sure Nancy Allred would use me for the publicity. If Casey Anthony doesn't fry, I should be able to do ANYTHING.

Please do not misunderstand me, I'm not looking to be arrested. I like to think that I'm smarter than stupid. However, I'm also much less tolerant than I once was. Sort of like a mother hen who will peck another chicken (rooster) to death for getting near her chicks...

In conclusion (thank you, Mrs. Cowgur in speech), it's been a really, REALLY, hard few months here at the Schutt house. We know what we have, we work hard for what we have. We want to make friends, but don't think you will railroad any of us without notice. I'm may ignore, but I won't ever forget and I know Karma personally.

Sign me, Happy and Complacent on Thompson.

There will be no fade-out
This is not the end
I'm down now
And I'll be standing on top again.
Times are hard but
I was built tough.
I'm gonna show you all what I'm made of.