On A Random Monday

As some of you may or may not know, I've recently started a walking regimen. I'm not a runner, although I want to be some day. There are times I feel like Forrest Gump. It's as if I were to win the lottery that I could fly to California and plan my route from one nice Hilton Hotel to the next. Mind you, this would be walking. I've successfully only made it the length of 5 telephone poles as of today. I know there is a skinny girl inside me dying to claw her way out...

I do take an all-natural supplement called Zija to, as someone put it, "Keep me from eating the ass-end out of a horse". This is not a commercial for that, so I'll leave it there. I am a very weak person, completely without willpower. Due to this fact, I have to have a family member drive me 8 miles from home in a different direction every day (this prevents anyone from knowing my pattern, as if someone actually wanted to stalk me).

Eight miles is equal to 2 hours for me. A 15-minute mile is hardly considered fast, but considering I haven't gotten out from behind a desk or chair in many years, this is quite a feat for me. Anyway, I get dropped off, and I do not take a phone. I couldn't take 10 steps without my ipod but a phone would be an easy "OUT" for me to call for rescue. Plus, I'd work from my BlackBerry the entire time if I had it.
For me, it's a getaway. It's 2 hours of the day with no communication, no Internet, no artwork. Someone (in the middle of nowhere in a mini-van) stopped me today and asked what I was listening to. Here is my playlist:

Michael Jackson - Man in the Mirror
Pink - Trouble & Fuckin' Perfect (She's pissy and I like it)
Queen - Fat Bottomed Girls (makes me run hard)
Lynard Skynard - Black Betty (Bamma Lamb)
Commodores - Brickhouse (36.24.36, as if this is possible)
Gap Band - Bad Mamma Jamma & Let It Whip
Kanye West - Stronger (Doesn't even need explanation)
50 Cent & Nelly (who thinks a woman should be 36.25.34)
Rolling Stones, Steve Miller Band, Counting Crows (Start Me Up, bec I'm a Space Cowboy and it's been a Long December).

And really, most of what I listen to is stuff that no one in this world still listens to or would care. I'm sure there is some psychology in the songs that I choose. The angry songs that insult me tend to make me want to go faster and farther.

Well, anyway, I've lost 60 plus pounds. I won't say how much because I'm afraid I'll jinx myself. I will let you know (even if you don't want to know) when I've hit 100 pounds. I'm all of 5'4" and my doctor's chart says 110 to 140 for my height. I'm going for 130; although Tony Schutt says my bones alone weigh 120. (Thank you, Tony, you've just picked a fight with a bulldog; and not like that pussy Ralph). I'm not running FROM anything, I'm running TO something....I just don't know what IT is yet.

In conclusion, my current signature line on my email is a quote from Ben Franklin. It goes a little something like this: "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote. I'll leave it at that. Goodbye, Monday.